Category Archives: Writing

Background to writing

I admit it. I am a murderer!

Not only that, I am a murderer with intent!

Years ago I stayed with a family in Sri Lanka; a memorable experience. One morning I spoke with Mrs Abysingi about my visitation from a fire fly the night before; an eerie light flying around the netting surrounding my bed. In the morning I made sure the creature was able to fly freely out of the window. She kindly said that I must be a Hindu like her, because I cared for all creatures.

But I’m not at the moment!

Each day I walk up the garden with murderous intentions. Why? Because greenfly and whitefly are attacking my lovely Lupin Tree!

This is what it should look like:

In May this year

After a while I noticed that it was beginning to look a little limp and the tell tale signs of hundreds of little critters made me realise I might be on the verge of losing this beauty. Not for the first time. This is Uncle of Lupin and Son of Lupin after the original suffered a similar infestation few years back.

In June this year

Determined to defeat it this time, I pruned off all of the flowers (conserving its strength) and began my campaign. Soapy water sprays, then vinegar and soapy water sprays nightly. I even resorted to insect killer a couple of times, but I hate to use it.

When I was beginning to win, I scanned the bush for signs and squashed them between my fingers! Oh how satisfying! Is this how a murderer feels I thought, as I hear the sound of the crunch or squish, depending on the maturity of the bug.

Now I have pared the whole bush down and am thinking

‘Nematodes’.

If my plant is going to survive I need a predator who can do my work for me, so that I don’t feel so guilty; like hiring a contract killer. I’ll let you know how they get on.

Has this got anything to do with my writing?

Well, not really but I’ve got it off my chest!

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Mental Awareness Week 10th to 16th May ~ Search for the Pearl Inside …

Reading about Mental Awareness Week on the Scottish Book Trust website there were two post which caught my eye:

The Callan Gordon Award is open for authors between between 18 and 35 years in memory of the tragic death of Callan, when he took his own life at 28 years through mental illness. Here’s Iain’s story, Callan’s Dad.

My heart goes out to Iain, who is still going through pain at the memory of events in 2011, ten years ago. Here’s the link to the award:

The Callan Gordon Award 2021

This is a way of supporting young Scottish authors too!

The second post on the Scottish Book Trust relating to Mental Awareness Week is how best to improve mental health by getting out and about in the natural world as described in Brian Kerr’s book How to Value a Skylark, The Countryside in a Time of Change.

The Scottish Book Trust describes 15 wonderful books and so, if you can’t absorb yourself in the natural world right now, then why don’t you settle down and relax and read one of these lovely books at home. I’ve only read The Living Mountain by Nan Shepherd in this list and it magically transports you to the wild places in the Cairngorms.

That brings me neatly to my little book of encouragement which I began writing as I was leaving my teaching post at Barnfield Further Education in Luton, giving young people a second chance; a book much needed as we emerge from lock down. The title speaks for itself:

Search for the Pearl Inside Yourself

A Gift Book of Encouragement for Young Adults

 

To be released on 25th June 2021

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Bereavement, Reflection and Moving Back into the World

Bereavement

There are those touched by this pandemic in a way which will live with them for the rest of their lives;

there are those who have really struggled with the isolation and it has adversely affected their mental well being,

and there are others who have sailed through and managed to ‘get on with life’ quite cheerfully throughout.

Of course there is overlap too.

Sometimes I think it is hard for each group to appreciate the other’s situation.

I have been overwhelmed by the love and sympathy from friends, family and the wider community of Kinghorn when my Mum became ill and my father died of Covid back on 10th January.

Normal life ceased.

Dad died at 93 years old. He had been retired for longer than he worked, he had enjoyed a good healthy life, dancing and travelling with Mum until two years ago…. and the end was thankfully very quick. He didn’t suffer too much so we were told.

Mum is still unwell, but she is being well cared for and we can speak to her on Zoom and phone (which we could rarely do when she was in hospital.) That’s all I can ask until, hopefully, I will see her again.

Reflection

My writing life ceased, although I continued with obligations for others when I could. Certainly at a slower pace.

…but my Dad wouldn’t have wanted me to wallow.

On reflection, two days before Dad  passed away, my last conversation with him was so positive. Looking back, he was thinking of me and the wider family and not himself.

‘You are happy up in Fife?’ he asked.

‘You’ve got a good life there, haven’t you?’

As I stood looking out over the Firth of Forth, as a container ship floated into my line of vision, I remarked, ‘I wish you were standing here with me Dad.’

At the end of our conversation I told him I loved him. Not something I have said very often in my whole life.

Looking back, we were both saying goodbye, and that is a comfort.

Moving On

Neither Dad nor Mum would want me to wallow anymore though.

As well as supporting other authors, part of my psyche is to create, to write and to let the words and ideas flow, later moulding them into  a form just right for sharing.

I hope to begin to focus on my projects again.

And so, slowly but surely, I will return to a ‘real’ world. Not the ‘normal’ before lockdown, but a different normal, building my confidence to be part of the writing community once more.

  Mum and Dad with us on Guernsey only   Three Years ago

 

What am I going to do in my writing life in the next few months?

  • Continue writing my current project ~ another Mystery Inspired by History
  • Publish a little book of encouragement for your adults, needing support finding direction on life following this pandemic
  • Get together poems I have written in the last few months about dementia
  • Promote my two mysteries.

…and that, I think, is enough for now.

MURDER, Now and Then will be only 99p on Kindle from 22nd February to 1st March 2021

MISSING, Past and Present will be only 99p on Kindle from 1st to 8th March 2021

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